ビッグ・パンプキン（ジェイ・Zのパロディ）｜ジェフリーの今週の曲

ビッグ・パンプキン（ジェイ・Zのパロディ）｜ジェフリーの今週の曲

It is time for my song of the week. Hi, Jeff. It’s Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And in the iconic words of Mr. Charlie Brown. Oh, great pumpkin, where are you? Deserved a bigger laugh for Charlie. I like Charlie Brown. I don’t like that. Now is the time when people are flocking out to the local pumpkin patches trying to hunt down the perfect gourd. It is like right now, prime time. I’m a tall and skinny lady. I don’t for my pumpkin. Go. Everyone’s walking up and down the line saying like, “Oh, you know, this one’s too small. This one’s too orange. This one’s not orange enough.” Some of those green yellow ones. This one’s shaped like Brook’s head. Bingo. That’s exactly what I wanted. It’s big. I have a large head. Just pop some glasses on it and call it a day. But it’s really evolved over the years where before like it was just a little patch of dirt with some pumpkins on it. You went grabbed a few and left. I mean, before you just went to the grocery store parking lot, but now they’ve made it into this whole experience with like corn mazes and hay rides and cinnamon doughut shops and farm animal kissing boots. Yes. And you got to buy apple butter for some reason. You’ll never use it, but you should buy it. Yes. $5 to mouth kiss the goat. Oh, wow. Wait, what? The farm animal kissing boots. Oh, not the not the greatest of all time in actual You must not have been listening to what I was saying. That’s okay. But for some families, you’re not going to get out of there for under $100 anymore. It’s just not going to happen. Dang, that’s expensive. I’ve never been to one, so I don’t know. There a lot. It is very commercialized. But that doesn’t mean it’s any less magical. A that almost is nice. Once you get out there and you experience the pure joy of trudging through a muddy field on an ice cold day, paying quadruple the price of grocery store pumpkins that they pulled from this exact same field just a week ago, man. They even pulled them for you. Yeah. Aren’t you guys excited or what? Yeah, let’s go. That’s why I had to sing about this timehonored tradition. And instead of doing Jay-Z’s big pimping, it’s Young Jeffy’s big pumpkin. Yes, it is. Let’s go, Jeff. All right, I’ll point when I’m ready. Point. It’s big pumpkin, baby. Big pumpkin. Yes. Yeah. You know I carve them, cut them, break them open to scrape out all the seeds and take them out the hood. Yeah. Smelling good. I’ll bake them up and eat them. Outside it’s cold and freezing. I’m talking about pumpkin season. Better get a booty out to the patch and pick one that’s decent on the farm where they keep them. Slopping in the mud just like a pig would want a veggie with a bountiful button. More back then chop the hut. Feel the cold cut like a turkey sub and eat something to warm me up. Yeah, they say you’re hot tighter by the fire and they put it in a Dixie cup. Yummy. I am hunting for a pumpkin. One that is freaking stunning. Orange color, rounded fatty. Your pumpkin sugar daddy. They w me a dozen cuz I love them. Going to take them home, man. Going to pry them open. Throw them in my oven. Make pumpkin pie. Ah ah ah ah ah. Yeah. Bacon. Aha. Ah ah ah. Ooh. Whipped cream on top. Ah ah ah a a muna. Ah ah ah ah ah. Yeah. We doing big pumpkins full of seeds. Check them out now. Big pumpkins in orange and green. We doing big pumpkins every Halloween and with a no return policy. Don’t need a receipt. No, no, no. Gourd hunting getting filthy. Now I got wet mud in my NK. Throwing a fall chill with a moderate breeze. I got more boogers than the pay place at Chuck Cheese. Cuz I’ll be in the corn maze. Don’t know where to go. Got lost next to a scary crow. My direction sense is terrible. Got to find that tractor area. Ooh, this tractor ride is awesome. That’s because I call shotgun. Some kid want to sit in the front and I say kid, that’s not my problem. If a pumpkin in the m get it unstuck, just got to wiggle it. Go to grab it by the stand, man. Jiggle it. Second base with a little more vigorous. Go take a look at the pumpkins out in the field and they lit the flow. So many shades of orange skin, it’s like I’m on Jersey show. Come in a jacko lands and it’s so rad, you just can’t handle. Put it on the porch outside. It shine so bright. All cuz my tea like candle. No stencil. But midnight come saw my new pumpkin was gone cuz Cinderella called it just a Uber back home. Shout out to the patches with the autumn attractions. And I really hope that they cash in cuz they’re growing that fruit as curvy as a Kardashian. There ain’t no point in wearing skins. Fresh baked donuts. Cinnamons. Walk out that farm with a double kid. But I go back again cuz we be all snug and wearing our fleece and flannels. shirt thumping our new ll beans. We loaded big pumpkins into my back seat. Couldn’t make it to the farm, so we went down the street. And now we be country pumpkins in the city just buying store pumpkins at the grocery. Rocking my North Face, that big coat and a G in the parking lot patch where the fries used to be. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My drop. Drop the pumpkin. Good. It makes me want to go this year. Last year I did just take my kids to the grocery store. Yeah, it’s magical, but not quite as magical. We still took one selfie. I was like, “Hey, one selfie, you guys.” Parking lot. Yeah, we’ll photoshop like a beautiful background behind us later. We’re going to keep it real, Jeff. Whatever you need to do to get your pumpkins. That was inspirational. Exactly. Everybody’s hunt looks different depending on who you are and where you are, but there’s nothing that beats the magic of grabbing that perfect pumpkin. Yeah. If you like the song, you have to carve your pumpkin at Jeff’s face this year. Oh, that would be good. Show logo. I’d appreciate that. And text in 78592. You could tell us what you thought about the song of the week. We’re going to post a video up with all the lyrics on all of our socials, on our YouTube, on Instagram, Tik Tok, all of it. Broken. We do fast raps because then you talk really fast afterwards. Yeah. Oh yeah. Let’s just get this over with and get on to the next thing. We got your phones out coming up right after

Nothing hits quite like the PERFECT trip to the Pumpkin Patch. Instead of Jay-Z’s “Big Pimpin'” it’s Jeffrey’s “Big Pumpkin!”

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Lyrics:
It’s Big Pumpkin, Baby
Big Pumpkin
Ye-Ye-Ye-Ye-Yeah

You know I… Carve em, Cut em, Break em open
To scrape out all the seeds and
Take ‘em out the hood, yea it’s smelling good
I’ll bake em up & eat em,
Outside it’s Cold & Freezing
Talkin’ bout “Pumpkin Season”
Better get your booty out to the Patch and
Pick one that’s Decent

On the Farm where they Keep em’
Sloppin’ in the Mud, Just like a PIG Would
Want a Veggie with a Bountiful Butt,
More Back than Jabba the Hutt
I Feel the Cold Cut like a Turkey Sub
Need Somethin’ to Warm me Up
Yea, They Sell ya Hot cider, by the fire
and they put it in a Dixie Cup! Yummy!

I am Hunting for a Pumpkin
One that is Freakin’ Stunning
Orange Color, Round & Fatty
Your Pumpkin Sugar Daddy
Bank Rolled me Dozen, cuz I Love em!
Gotta take em HOME and
Gonna Pry em Open
Throw ‘em in my Oven,
Make Pumpkin P-I-I-I-I-E,
Yea, Bake it on Hi-I-I-I-IGH
Oooo, Whipped Cream on T-O-O-O-P
Mmm, Eat some TON-I-I-I-I-GHT

Yea, we doin’ Big Pumpkins, full of seeds
Check em out now!
Big Pumpkins, in Orange & Green
We doin, Big Pumpkins every Halloween,
And with the NO RETURN Policy, Don’t Need a Receipt!
No No No!
Gourd Hunting, Gettin’ filthy
Now I Got Wet Mud In my N-I-K-E’s
Throw in a Fall Chill with a Moderate Breeze…
I got more Boogers than the PLAY PLACE at Chuck E Cheese

Cuz I’ll be in the Corn Maze, Dont know Where to Go!?
Got Lost Next to a ScareCrow
My Direction Sense Is Terrible
Gotta find that Tractor Area OH!
Oooo, this Tractor Ride is Awesome
That’s Because I called Shotgun!
Some kid wants to sit in the Front, and I say
“Kid that’s Not My Problem!”

If a Pumpkin’s in the Muck, Get it unstuck
Just gotta Wiggle It
Go Grab it by the Stem & Jiggle It
2nd Base, but a Little more Vigorous
Go take a Look, at the Pumpkins out in the field,
They Litter the Floor!
So many Shades of Orange skin, it’s like i’m on
Jersey Shore

Carvin’ a Jack-o-Lantern, it’s so rad, you just can’t Handle
Put it on the Porch outside, it shines so bright
all cuz my Tealight Candle! No Stencil!
But Midnight come, Saw my new Pumpkin was GONE?
Guess Cinderella called It, Just to UBER Back Home?

Shout Out to the patches!
With the Autumn Attractions
…And I really hope that they cash in
Cuz they growing that FRUIT as Curvy as Kardashians
There ain’t no point in Wearing’ Skims
Fresh Baked Donuts & Cinnamon
Walk out that Farm with a Double Chin
But I’d go Back again…

Cuz we be, All Snug & Wearing our Fleece
And Flannels
Shirt Thumping our new L.L. Beans
We Loading Big Pumpkins into my Back Seat
Couldn’t Make it to the Farm, so we Went down the Street
Now We Be, Country Bumpkins in the City
Just Buying Store Pumpkins at the Grocery
Rockin my “North Face”, that Big Coat Energy
In the Parking Lot Patch, where the FRY’S used to be!